She Thinks You’re A Wuss!

So you hit the gym seven days a week.  You’ve got pecs that could crush walnuts.  You can walk a straight line after a fifth of gin, and you’ve got three scars on your back from where you rushed into a burning firework stand to save a kitten.

Big deal.  Chances are, women still think you’re a wuss.

Confidence takes more than just biceps curls

No, I’m not saying this because I’m jealous.  I’m saying it because, if you’re like most men, you buy women drinks, give them little gifts, pay their way every time you go out, and just generally put them on a pedestal and worship them.  This is called supplication, Beefsteak.  And contrary to what Grandpa may have taught you about dating etiquette, it makes you look like a chump.

Get up off your knees…unless, y’know, you’re into that

Supplication is any action you take that puts her desires ahead of yours, or puts you in an inferior social position to her, and it blows all the effort you’ve put into building confidence to shreds.  It can take a variety of forms; aside from the examples listed above, notorious supplicating moves include giving the appearance of actively pursuing a woman, putting her in a situation where she makes most of the decisions (i.e. asking where she wants to go for dinner, when she wants to go out, etc.), acting “clingy”, or admitting that you have “feelings” for her, especially if she hasn’t already done so first.

The problem with this type of behavior is that it gives the woman control; it either puts her in a leadership role in the relationship, or makes you appear vulnerable.  Either way, you come out looking like a major wuss.  No woman likes to be with a wuss.  And once she realizes you’re a wuss, you get canned–and all the work you’ve put into building confidence goes right out the window.

You’ve probably realized by this point in the course that building confidence is extremely important to your dating success.  There’s plenty of advice in our Members’ Section to help you with that.  But don’t forget, you don’t stop needing confidence as soon as you learn each others’ names.  Confidence with women has to be maintained throughout the entire relationship; in fact, it gets even more important after you progress beyond the introductory stage, when the things that can chip away your confidence become subtler in nature and harder to detect.  And really, this is what supplication is all about:  lack of confidence.

When you have no confidence with women, you try to compensate by providing gifts and handing decisions over to them in a misguided attempt to display your self-worth.  But women see through this.  It’s true that women in general are better at reading people than men are, and they will know if you lack confidence, even if you don’t.  And that, my friends, is the true definition of a wuss:  a man lacking confidence.  Just as women are initially attracted to confident men, they want to stay with confident men–men who take charge, men who are leaders, who make the decisions and don’t back down.  In short, men who wear the pants.  So don’t fall into the wuss trap; continue to build your confidence, before, during, and after the pick up.  And if you find yourself supplicating, stop and remind yourself who’s boss, or risk getting stomped on like any other wuss.

Want more great advice on building confidence?  In our Members’ Section you’ll find the info you need to polish every aspect of your game, from self-esteem, to wardrobe, to conversation skills and beyond.  So why waste time?  Chicks aren’t.  Sign up today!

You’re Not Going To Get Her Acting Like That…

Developing the right pick up attitude is essential both to building your own self-confidence and creating attraction in women.  Yesterday we discussed the problems with “just being yourself”, and suggested that instead you should be your best self.  Let’s take a closer look at what that means, and why that is.

Attitude–your billboard to the world

Believe it or not, attitude is most often the first thing women notice in a guy.  Even before they take in your looks, most people will pick up on your attitude.  Therefore, your attitude with women is the single most important factor in developing attraction.  You usually convey attitude subconsciously–that is, without really thinking about it:  in your posture, the way you move, and so on.  Which means that attitude is very difficult to fake; adopting the attitude you want mentally is much more effective than working on the external aspects of it.

Now, because attitude is a pretty basic component of your psychology, it takes some effort to change.  The good news, though, is that whatever affects your attitude in one area of your life, affects it in all the others.  This means that you can improve your confidence with women by improving your attitude in other areas of your life.  You do this, not by being yourself–but by being your best self.

Be all that you can be

Being your best self means putting forth your best effort in everything you do–your career, your hobbies, school, whatever.  It doesn’t mean you have to be the best; a Nobel Prize or an Olympic gold medal isn’t necessary to pick up women, although it couldn’t hurt.  Rather, you can gain immense self-confidence simply from the knowledge that you apply yourself 100% to everything that you do; all the material gains you get from this are just icing on the cake, and can only further boost your confidence.

You can see this in action by observing an experienced pick up artist at work.  Very few guys start out with an unshakeable pick up attitude; most of them have something else going for them, whether it’s a great job, a sweet car, or good looks.  The self-confidence they’ve built up by improving these areas of their lives–through 100%, best-self effort–helps establish the attitude that they have something worthwhile to offer, that they’re worthy of getting women.  This attitude is the basis for developing confidence with women.

Crafting a self-confident dating attitude doesn’t just help you overcome your fear of rejection, it actually attracts women.  Ask any woman what turns them on in a guy they’ve just met; I’ll practically guarantee you that at least 90% answer “confidence”.  So building confidence should be your main objective, which you can achieve both by studying the tips in our Members’ Section, and by improving the areas of your life outside dating.

The long and the short of it is this:  The idea of being your best self is something you should implement in every area of your life.  You can apply the confidence you gain from success in any field to picking up women.  This not only makes it easier to overcome your own self-doubt, it makes you more attractive to women as well.

But while a solid pick up attitude is an important foundation, you’ll need more tips and techniques to become a true pick up master.  So don’t wait; sign up now to get access to all the great secrets in our Members’ Section, and improve your game today!