The Basics of Body Language

Long before cavemen made the leap from grunting to speech, human beings were using body language.  Body language has been the most basic means of sharing information among humans for millenia.  Even in today’s world of champion crossword tournaments and 20-plus pound dictionaries, body language accounts for a startling amount of our interpersonal communication–according to some researchers, as much as 80%.

Naturally, body language can be an effective tool for creating attraction with women.  As David DeAngelo demonstrates in this video, there are specific techniques for conveying the attributes you want women to notice in you–confidence, charisma, and above all, masculinity.  Here are a few of them.

Body languages DOs…

Let’s start with the face.  A serious expression seems to be your best bet; a furrowed brow and a slight squint.  Try not to smile too much–a big, dumb grin will lose you a lot of serious points.  Better to have a kind of sarcastic smirk; this betrays good humor without making you look like a doofus.

Eye contact suggests interest, so try to avoid it.  If you remember from our other videos, you don’t want to seem too interested in a girl you’re first meeting.  At the same time, however, you don’t want to ignore her completely, or look around constantly, as though distracted.  Instead, try to gaze off in another direction, glancing her way occasionally, but only for a second or two at a time.  This will keep her guessing as to your level of interest, which will in turn make her more curious about you.

As for the rest of the body, it’s all about relaxation.  Not that you should slouch forward, which will make you look self-conscious or uncomfortable.  Instead, lean back, keep your head up and your shoulders down.  Clasp your hands in your lap, or keep them on your thighs (NOT your knees–this looks kind of jittery).  You’re trying to look confident, self-assured, a little cocky, and in total control of the situation.  Imagine a king on a throne; now imagine him after a big meal, and you’re getting close.

…and DON’Ts

On a similar note, you’ll want to avoid certain types of body language.  The audience members in the video seem to agree that crossing one’s legs comes across as effeminate.  If you must cross your legs, by all means, avoid the knee-over-knee pose, as this looks downright womanly.

Sitting up straight can give a lot of different impressions, including nervousness, tension, and prudishness.  These effects are even stronger if you hold your legs close together.  Lean back, and give your boys some breathing room.

These body language tips are a great starting point; use them, and you’re guaranteed to look the part of a true PUA.  But body language alone won’t get you through your first encounter with the woman of your dreams; for that, you’ll need to pick up some info on subjects like behavior, conversation, and attitude.  And what better place for that than our Members’ Section?  We’ve got tons of great videos to guide you from the first impression all the way through to the last.  So don’t settle for looking the part:  be the part.  Sign up today!

Body Language First, Words Second

Student: “What should I say to her?”
Deline: “Doesn’t matter.”

Student: “What do you mean?  I need to have something to say!” 

Deline: “You need nothing, you already have everything.”

I sound like a guru on top of a mountain dispensing universal truths to some poor soul seeking enlightenment.  He has made the treacherous trek proving that he wants to improve his dating life, and here at bar on top of the world between the snow capped mountains… he’s wasting time thinking what to open with.  

Student: “WTF?  I can’t just walk up to her and say whatever comes to my mind!  That’s crazy Deline, I can’t!  I’m going to fail.” 

Deline:  <Sigh> “Start with the first solid step in her direction.   Get those hands out of your pockets and stand up straight.   Smile a little… no not that cheesy grin, bro!  Just a little smirk.  Yes, better… slow your gestures down.  Speak up.  Don’t lean over her.  And don’t forget to body rock.   Yes, perfect, like that!  Now go tell her…  you like salad.”                                                                                          

** 

Hi, I’m Deline.  I teach grown men how to attract women here in Washington DC.  My students tend to be very smart and driven guys; engineers, lawyers, doctors and programmers.  

On paper, they’re every woman’s dream.   In reality, they tend to be nightmare dates.  They have spent years studying and then working their way up careers to finally be able to acquire all the status symbols of success they can get their hands on, and to their dismay, none of that stuff matters to women.  And by the time they come to me, they’re usually on the brink of giving up forever.  These aren’t the kinds of guys that like to admit failure, and desperation has started to set in.  

Body Language First, Words Second 

All approaches start with your body language, what you actually say comes secondary. 

How you walk, how you speak, how you maintain the space around you, how you respond to people, all speak volumes well ahead of whatever words you choose to spit out.

Your body language is the way to signal your confidence without bragging.  If you got it going on, you don’t need to brag about it, you just walk exuding the knowledge that you are confident in your own skin.  

Sure, my students are confident in what they do for a living, but stick them in a bar full of women, and it’s like watching fish out of water, just flopping around gasping for air, and trying to do anything and everything hoping that something eventually works.  

So the very first step in fixing this hot mess, is literally asking my students to take a few steps towards me.  Helping them get their body language under control dramatically helps their chances. With strong body language, what you actually end up saying… doesn’t really matter. 

Here’s my checklist of Do’s and Don’ts regarding Body Language:
Members Login to view this content. (Not a member? Join Today!)