This is a tough one for a lot of guys. Men are notorious for their lack of fashion sense, almost as much so as women are for their obsession with it. Most of us are pretty content with a stained T-shirt and dirty jeans, and probably wish we lived in a world where we could get away with that look all the time.
Unfortunately, we don’t. Our society places a huge emphasis on how we dress, so dressing correctly is critical to making a good first impression. This is especially true for meeting women; the stereotypes are right on this one, they notice everything, and they judge. Harshly. So you’re going to have to learn some of the basics of dressing yourself if you want to get your foot in the door. Relax, it’s not as painful as you might think.
Step 1: Dress for the occasion
Fashion, contrary to popular perception, is all about self-expression, so use it to express who you are and what kind of women you’re interested in. A good trick to use: Imagine the kind of woman you’d like to meet. Focus on what she’s wearing. Now put on the approximate male version of her clothes. So if you go for the more alternative, punk-rocker kind of girls, dress yourself that way: jeans (preferably a little worn-out) and a T-shirt are fine. For the sorority girl, spring break type of crowd, you might want to ditch the T-shirt in favor of a nice, but not too dressy, button-down, and well-maintained jeans or khakis. A classier woman will demand a dressier shirt and hard-soled shoes; you might also want to exchange the jeans for slacks at this point. A real fashion diva will expect the same kind of attentiveness in a guy: name-brand everything, and don’t be afraid to top it off with a suit coat.
Another good yardstick is to think of the kind of pick up venue you’re heading to, and follow their typical dress code. So for a concert or dive bar, ripped-up jeans and a band shirt, but definitely put on a suit if you’re heading to an exclusive club. You probably won’t want to stray too much beyond these extremes; you’ll never make a decent first impression in sweats, jeans with enough holes to get you arrested, or a shirt that looks like it just saw a fight with the Incredible Hulk. By the same token, you won’t really need a tie unless you’re going to a real jet-set event–in which case, pick out a good one.
Step 2: Coordinate!
Some of you might have cringed when you read this, but it’s a lot simpler than it sounds, and it’s one of the most important parts of making a good first impression. Women pay a lot of attention to how we coordinate our apparel, so definitely put some effort into it.
First off, the easy stuff: jeans go with any color, as do the colors white, black and brown. If you really can’t absorb the rest of this material, stick with this and you won’t go wrong.
Your belt and shoes must match if you’re wearing anything dressier than tennis shoes. Black belt, black shoes. Brown belt, brown shoes. You probably won’t want to go with any colors other than these for these items.
If you’re wearing a suit, it should be a solid, neutral color (some shade of black, white, or brown) or a very subtle pattern, like pin stripes. Your shirt and tie should either each be a different solid color, or one should be a solid and one should be a pattern. Never wear a patterned shirt with a patterned tie.
Matching other colors isn’t too hard either. To make it simpler, find a color wheel. You might remember this from grade school art class; it displays all the colors of the spectrum as a circle, each color blending into the one next to it. Pick out the color you want to wear on the wheel; the colors directly across from it match in a bold way, while the ones to either side (but not directly next to it) make for a more understated look. Voilà! You just matched colors. The exception to this rule is red and green; you don’t want to look like a Christmas tree.
Step 3: Accessorize!
Remember, these are seasoning. Don’t go overboard with gold chains and rings on each finger. But do dress it up a little; one ring, a masculine-looking bracelet (or watch, or wristband of some kind), or something similar will do the trick. Ideally, this should be a conversation piece, a single item that stands out, maybe with a story behind it–something you picked up on vacation, a gift from a family member, or something along those lines. Neck jewelry, as a general rule, should be toned down; unless it’s something really interesting, you might want to wear it under your shirt. And be very careful with piercings; if you’re dressing up at all, a face full of metal might make the wrong first impression.
There you go, stud-muffin. You should be dressed to impress any lady. One last word of warning, though: don’t be too rigid. Everyone is different, and a look that works for one guy might not work for you. So have fun with your clothes, pick out what you like and what you think looks good on you. Keep this in mind, and you’ll be ready to make a first impression that lasts all night long.
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About John Lione
